I Think You're Fat.

Actually, I don't. But I DO think that this article from Esquire Magazine** (from way back in 2007) is really intriguing. The author, A.J. Jacobs, takes on a movement called Radical Honesty in which one is supposed to be, well, radically honest. Say whatever is on your mind, hold nothing back, don't sugarcoat it. The results? Mixed.

When the author confesses to a friend that he was insulted at not being invited to his wedding, the friend confesses that he did it in retaliation for not being invited to the author's wedding years before. Apparently the whole thing was a mix-up: "A breakthrough! We are communicating! Blanton is right. Brian and I crushed some eggshells. We are not stoic, emotionless men. I'm enjoying this. A little bracing honesty can be a mood booster."

But when his wife is telling him a story and he blatantly says he doesn't want to listen anymore? Not such good results. And as Jacobs says: "Ninety percent of the time I love my wife...And 10 percent of the time I hate her. Why should I hurt her feelings that 10 percent of the time? Why not just wait until that phase passes and I return to the true feeling, which is that I love her?"

Which brings up the question: is it okay to be totally honest or are white lies necessary to keep from hurting others? Or even more thought-provoking: are we capable of being totally honest?

I am inclined to say no. As humans, we are designed to have censors that keep us from doing and saying whatever we feel like. Not only does this benefit other people, it benefits us. What happens if you eat whatever happens to look good? You get chubby. What happens if you say whatever you want whenever you want? You destroy social bonds (and occasionally hurt other people). And your brain is always deciding how information is filtered and presented, so chances are the information as you are seeing it isn't even the truth in the first place. At the risk of sounding too New Age-y, there could be no literal "truth" to tell.

When Mr. Jacobs tells his twenty-seven-year-old nanny that he would ask her out if he wasn't married and that she is "stunning," he confesses that it visibly makes her nervous. Um, yeah, you're hitting on someone who works for you. Sexual harassment much? But Brad Blanton, the founder of Radical Honesty, states that sex talk in the work place doesn't count as sexual harassment and it is society's inability to handle the truth that's the real problem.

Here's my bit of honesty for the day: I think Brad Blanton is an idiot who, despite being called a "psychotherapist" has clearly never actually studied psychology.

What are your thoughts? Think you could be radically honest for a day? A month? Your entire life?


**I don't happen to read Esquire magazine on a regular basis, the article was just something I stumbled upon. However, if you happen to be female and up for a few good laughs, I highly recommend that you read some of the things the mag has to say about women because they can be hilariously innaccurate. Are women's mags that inaccurate about men? Hmm...

Happy Valentines Day

Whether you're going out, staying in, or ignoring the day completely, have a good one.

A few Valentines Day posts I didn't have time for:

The World's Smallest Valentine (which you can customize!)

Valentine's Day Lingerie via The Daily Obsession

An adorable lovebirds greeting card (above)

A button I probably need to buy (hi Nathan!)

Not a Valentines Day person at ALL? Support V-day instead (and help end violence against women and girls)

Valentines Day Flowers

Today I stumbled across Susannah Conway, a photographer featured on Bliss, and was captivated by her beautiful images of the world around her. I especially loved these two photos of flowers: "Solitude" (above) and "Sunshine" (below). Wouldn't they make a perfect Valentines Day gift?

It's like getting your sweetie flowers without having to pay the ridiculous florist shop prices (twice as much money for the same flowers just because it's Valentines Day? I think not!).

Images belong to Susannah Conway, and you can see more on her etsy shop Unravelling

Homemade Beauty

via allposters.com

I really liked this article on Total Beauty about making your own natural beauty products. The VAST majority of my beauty products are store bought, but I do have some homemade tricks that I use. Extra virgin olive oil is sweet for taking off stubborn mascara and honey and oatmeal will make a great facial mask for an oilier, combination skin type (ahem, me).

I especially like the "recipes" included in the article, especially the honey lip scrub:
1 tsp of olive oil
1 tsp of honey
2 tsp of white granulated sugar
A dash of lemon juice

Mix and apply, basically. How easy is that? And I can't believe I've never thought of using lemon on my flaky lips before, it seems so obvious (hellooo citric acid!).

Also, the chamomile and oatmeal scrub/mask looks like it could be nice:
1/4 cup chamomile tea (brewed and cooled to room temp)
1/4 cup oatmeal (lightly ground)
2 tbsp honey
2 drops of almond oil (not sure where you get this, a health food store?)

I might have to try some of these out soon. I'm intrigued by the idea of homemade products partially because they're cheaper, but also because by putting them together yourself, you know exactly what is going in them. No scary toxins here!

Has anybody else tried at-home beauty products? Have they worked or not? Spill your secrets!

When is your best thinking time?

I am of the opinion that everybody has one time of day where they do all their best and most creative thinking. Mine is definitely at night, usually when I crawl into bed. Suddenly when I get a little sleepy, I get all these awesome ideas in my head for research projects I want to try, or new topics for the blog, or new ways to decorate my house. Of course, about half the time I forget these awesome ideas before the morning- one of the pitfalls of doing my best thinking at night. And if I get really excited about the idea, I have trouble sleeping. I've started keeping a journal next to my bed so that if a particularly brilliant thought hits and starts nagging at me, I can jot it down before I drift off to sleep.

When is your best thinking time? First thing in the morning? During your lunch break? Any other midnight Einsteins out there?

Image via this article on Hydrohealth about keeping your heart healthy. Apparently getting less than 5 hrs of sleep a night increases your chance of heart disease, although they don't really say how much. Hm- looks like I may have to get better at thinking some other time of day.

Valentine's Coupons

I like the idea of printing off a little coupon book for your loved one on Valentines Day. Not only is the idea totally cute, but low-key as well (and relatively free!). You can make your own coupons personalized with things you know your sweetie would like, or order them from the Etsy shop everydaygrace.

Image via everydaygrace.

Yarn Flowers

These cute 3 Valentine Flowers from Etsy make me happy :) I want them on my desk looking all cheerful right now.